From: firstname.lastname@example.org (John Morton)
Subject: A copy of my Coming Out letter to my parents
Date: Sun, 24 Mar 1996 17:13:55 -0400
I recently found an early version of the letter I wrote to my parents when
I came out to them. (I wrote it several more times after this, but can't
find those.) I thought I would post it with the hope it can help someone
else figure this difficult experience. If nothing else, it is another
record of how someone else dealt with it.
I had just finished school and moved to New York. I had planned on telling
my parents in person that I was gay when I stayed at their home the week
before I moved to the city, but I could never bring myself to do it. I was
just too nervous. So, I wrote it in a letter about a month later and took
it out to the mailbox at about 1 am and dropped it in. I didn't want to
wait until the morning because I was afraid I would chicken out. It turns
out I slept really well that night. Here is the letter I wrote them.
Mom & Dad,
I am writing to tell you something I have wanted to tell you for a while
now. I am gay. You probably already know this, though. From the lack of
girlfriends and not dating and all, it has probably been obvious to you
longer than it has been to me.
I hope you donıt take this whole gay thing negatively on how you raised me
or anything. You did a great job raising me. Your have given me a solid
self-respect along with respect for other people. Just think how few young
people today have been raised with out this respect. This self-pride has
really helped me deal with being gay.
I have actually known I was gay since I was pretty young. Probably in
junior high. I just didnıt know what to call it. Also, for a while, I
rebelled against it by going to church a lot. I thought it would ³cure² me
or something. Now I know there is no ³cure² because there is nothing wrong
with being gay. There are gay cats, dogs, cows, and birds. It is a natural
thing. The church kind of screwed me up for a while but I learned from
Telling myself out loud that I am gay took a while but it released so much
pressure inside of me that I wish I had been able to do it a long time
ago. My friends at school have helped me out by being supportive, too.
I tried to tell you when I was home but the opportunity never really
presented itself. I want you to call me when you have had time to think
about this. It took me a long time to accept being gay and I realize it
may take some time for you too. I want to talk to you about this but will
wait for you to call me.
home page: http://www.inch.com/~john21/
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